Overcoming Loneliness- How Fibromyalgia can Isolates you?

by M G Rana, MD.

Invisible illnesses can be very isolating. Fibromyalgia and loneliness have a severe impact on your social activities if you’re diagnosed with fibromyalgia. When people look at you they don’t see an illness, they simply see a person. Many doctors, friends and even close family members begin to disbelief your symptoms over the course of time.

It can be challenging at best to explain that you’re always fatigued and can’t make plans ahead of time. You almost start to distrust yourself except that you have the symptoms and feel worn out and tired all of the time.

Then there is the pain. Those dull aches that sometimes edge forward into full on pain. You can only take so much pain medication to alleviate the pain. The trick of course is finding ways to enjoy social activities that won’t stress you out and exacerbate your condition. Pre planning can be entirely out of the question since you never really know how you’re going to feel from one day to the next.

To struggle the isolation and misery you’ll have to work even harder to find communal connections. There are a variety of ways to do this without having to over tax your body. There are logical reasons why living with fibromyalgia can make it appear like you’re living on the edge. Beyond the physical pain of fibromyalgia is the emotional pain that can come from trying to cope with a relentless condition.

Whether it’s deficiency of understanding from friends or family members or the sensibleness of working through fibromyalgia pain, exhaustion, and other fibromyalgia symptoms, it’s simple to feel that you’re set adrift. When you are affected by both fibromyalgia and depression, as many are, you begin to see the outside world differently.

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This is the nature of depression; it makes good things bad and bad things seem even worse. Additionally, it makes people take illogical and irrational action in the name of depression.  For many with fibro, depression is not the problem the problem is what you do to combat depression. Following are some reasons why fibromyalgia is the cause of loneliness.

Trauma

Fibromyalgia symptoms are occasionally triggered by a traumatic incident, although the cause of fibromyalgia isn’t fully understood. “Our bodies were meant to live in ‘rest and relax,’ not ‘fight or flight. Though fibromyalgia is like an endless fight-or-flight setting like a fireman who is always running into a blazing building and when you’re whole system is set to trauma response, it’s tough to invest in relations. Read More on Trauma and fibro here

Practical barriers

Pain, fatigue, and related problems such as sleeplessness and mood changes can make it difficult to show up at social events or even work up the energy for a phone call. These barriers cause isolation and depression. “As people with fibromyalgia pull away from activities that gave their life importance and become more publicly withdrawn, it is not unusual for symptoms of depression to slowly develop.

See the wall

Isolation does not happen quickly; unless there is a traumatic event that triggers isolation, it occurs slowly over time. Perhaps your fibro coincidentally flared on days you had plans to visit with friends. By canceling your plans, you were inadvertently building your wall and moving towards isolation. People who isolate do so for a reason. Even though the reason may not make good sense, there is a reason.

If you cannot discover the reason, you cannot see the wall for what it is. The original purpose of the wall may even have been distorted or exaggerated over time. Why is your wall there? What did you hope to achieve in building the wall? What factors lead to the wall being erected when it was? Why didn’t you build the wall earlier? What actions or reactions make the wall bigger and stronger?

Here are some ways to help you continue your social relations when you’re suffering from fibromyalgia and loneliness.

Manage other medical issues

Mostly fibromyalgia is the result of a trauma (physical or emotional) and it can lead to a numerous other conditions. Make sure that these other conditions are being treated as well. This can help you to deal with the fibromyalgia. If you’ve suffered a trauma make sure that you’re getting proper medical care for said injury.

If you’ve undergone emotional mistreatment via an ex-spouse or someone else, get some psychotherapy (again, this can be online if you’re not up to going to a counselors office somewhere else) to overcome the loneliness and give yourself consent to grieve the situation and your doctor has prescribed medications for your other medical issues be sure to take them according to your doctor’s instructions.

Avoid abusing said medications and if you think that the medications aren’t effective be certain to converse this with your doctor and your therapist if you have one. There are often other medications that a doctor can prescribe for you so don’t hesitate to speak up. Your doctor can’t help you if you don’t tell them how you’re feeling.ove forward. You don’t have to suffer from abuse from anyone and you’re worth more than that.

Find new hobbies

Sometimes you have to come up with new hobbies because you’re too tired or in too much pain for the former hobbies. Join a group discussion online on your favorite movie or book. Study trivia and commit it to memory. Focus on new ways to entertain you that don’t require physical activity. Use brain power instead of physical activity.

Get plenty of rest

It is amazing what plenty of rest can do for any condition. As a fibromyalgia patient you may need more rest than others do, that’s acceptable Everyone’s body is different. If you need nine hours of rest daily in lieu of the average six to eight hours, so be it. It’s also important to note that rest doesn’t necessarily mean sleep.

Join support Group

join a positive support group, it will help you to vent and spoke out the feeling. Mostly people with fibro faces the issues that no one understand us and our illness. so support group is the place where you find people like you, they understand you, guide you and motivates you. For support and Discussion join the group “Living with Fibromyalgia and Chronic Illness”

So following these direction, you can overcome the loneliness and isolation. And never forget, you are special, don’t give up. Stay Strong.

References:

  • Fibromyalgia and Isolation via Fibromyalgia Treating
  • Fibromyalgia: Overcoming Loneliness By Madeline R. Vann, MPH via Everyday health

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